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Translating a Haynes Car Repair Manual
Haynes: Rotate anticlockwise
Translation: Clamp with molegrips, then beat repeatedly with hammer.
H: This is a snug fit.
T: You will skin your knuckles.
H: This is a tight fit.
T: Not a hope in hell mate.
H: Pry.
T: Hammer a screwdriver into.
H: Retain tiny spring.
T: "-Jeez, what was that nearly had my eye out?"
H: Compress.
T: Squeeze with all your might, jump up and down on, swear at, throw at garage wall, then search in the dark corner for a while muttering "bugger" repeatedly under your breath.
H: Inspect.
T: Squint at really hard and pretend you know what you are looking at, then declare in a knowing voice to your wife: "-Yep, as I thought, it's going to need a new one!"
H: Get an assistant.
T: Prepare to humiliate yourself in front of a friend.
H: Refitting is the reverse sequence to removal.
T: ... but you swear in different places.
H: Prise away locating pegs.
T: Snap off.
H: Index.
T: List of all the things in the book bar the one you want to do.
terv, teager